# Do you show your net worth?



## Just a Guy (Mar 27, 2012)

I hang out with a wide variety of people, some very wealthy, some not. Sometimes these worlds collide and I find it interesting to watch. I've become very good at spotting wealthy people, but it's not from the clothes they wear...

Many wealthy people drive older, well made cars, and their conversation usually gives them away (they own businesses, real estate, investments, etc., but they don't talk mutual funds). The things they have tend to be "more refined", and they travel a lot, for longer periods.

Many "paycheque" people tend to drive flashy cars, fancy clothes, and, ironically, suits. They buy all the latest toys and gadgets too. Their trips are short and busy, not relaxing. They usually live in the best neighbourhoods they can afford, whereas the wealthy guys live in the more frugal "better" areas with no mortgages...

The wealthy guys tend to assume that others around them are also wealthy, whereas the less wealthy assume those around them are the same as they are...

Very millionaire next door kind of thing, as Rider fans would say..."we walk among you". I find, in general, the ones who "dress for success" are still trying to get there.

So, the question is, if your one of the higher net worth kind of people, do you show it off, or would you fit more into the group I know?


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## Nemo2 (Mar 1, 2012)

Define "higher net worth".


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## randomthoughts (May 23, 2010)

Haha and also, how does one even answer this question without seeming either self-aggrandizing or falsely modest? 

I'm betting that most share both traits, depending on what they happen to value/circumstance. Sure, I don't spend much on clothes, but if I were super-hot, I totally would.


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## GoldStone (Mar 6, 2011)

Just a Guy said:


> Many wealthy people drive older, well made cars


I drive an older, well made car. Hmmm.... I must be wealthy.


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## Just a Guy (Mar 27, 2012)

I suppose the definition of high net worth should be a "qualified investor".


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## Just a Guy (Mar 27, 2012)

randomthoughts said:


> Haha and also, how does one even answer this question without seeming either self-aggrandizing or falsely modest?
> 
> I'm betting that most share both traits, depending on what they happen to value/circumstance. Sure, I don't spend much on clothes, but if I were super-hot, I totally would.


Well, I think it's fairly easy to answer...do you drive expensive cars, wear expensive suits/clothes, wear expensive jewelry like a Rolex (are you leveraged to the hilt to do it?), because you like to and can afford it...or do you prefer to dress in more practical clothes, drive a Toyota or Honda, etc... Maybe a combination of the two (Rolex and no name blue jeans?).

Nothing self-aggrandizing or false modest about it, it's just a choice of lifestyle...you can quickly tell by looking at your stuff.


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## techcrium (Mar 8, 2013)

I'm not wealthy by any means but I think I am above average for my age group.

$80K+ age 26.

I drive an 2000 Toyota Corolla. From time to time, I do check on autotrader and fantasize about owning a nicer car. Perhaps a G35 or BMW or something. However, I plan on driving the car until it breaks.

Same with clothes. From time to time, I do check on quality clothing e.g. $800 winter jackets. Though, I probably wouldn't buy it.


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## nobleea (Oct 11, 2013)

Subtlety is best. The look on someone's face when they realize you're much wealthier than they had assumed is far better than the look on their face when they realize your mortgage/debts are much bigger than they had assumed.

I have a couple friends that we regularly talk about net worth and such with. But with most others, it never comes up in conversation, and if it did, I would downplay the discussion. I certainly don't show it outwardly. POS car, small house, average clothes.


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## tygrus (Mar 13, 2012)

This has more to do with security than wealth. People insecure with their level of income usually try to project more status with luxury purchases and a lot of talk. People that have the actual wealth don't care about any of that. In fact, they know depreciating assets very well and would never own them.


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## donald (Apr 18, 2011)

I am pretty well off(certainly in the mass pop)But,my yearly income while in a certain range can fluctuate.
I find(comparisons)i am somewhat up against couples(2 earners)so while on a individual basis i am usually on par(nevermind saving rate)or a bit ahead it is hard to tell.(against age range/peers)
I am not flashy at all.
I do have some friends who are ''flashy'' and have all the trappings but......they really are not petending(160ish+k incomes,and likely not really caring about allocating anything to retirement ect)
the older i get the more i don't know what is wealthy!hard to tell,though i am slowly not even caring about that(just want to run my own race)


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## lightcycle (Mar 24, 2012)

Just a Guy said:


> So, the question is, if your one of the higher net worth kind of people, do you show it off, or would you fit more into the group I know?


Maybe you've got a narrow sample size to draw your generalizations from, but the people where I work are high earners (the salaries are pretty much public knowledge) and they don't attempt to hide it. Some do it to show up the Jones', others I can honestly say just want to enjoy all the finer things in life or to reward themselves.

In my experience, savers and spenders come in all shapes, sizes and income brackets.


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## Janus (Oct 23, 2013)

I really enjoy conversations on this topic. There does indeed seem to be a fundamental difference between the actually wealthy and those trying to look prosperous.

I'm certainly not wealthy, but I'm 27 with $110k in net assets making $100k/yr so I think I'm on the wealthier side for my cohort.

I certainly spend less than other people my age on clothes and "things" (no ipad, no car, cheap furniture, relatively cheap clothes), but since I work in finance some people tend to assume I'm wealthy despite the lack of signs that would show it. Of course that's usually a wrong assumption, as I've seen lots of bankers go into debt with spending despite their large paycheques.

At the end of the day I'm not wealthy yet. But when I do get to a point of actual wealth I don't intend to show it, but rather intend to enjoy it via freedom (both mentally and geographically).


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## Plugging Along (Jan 3, 2011)

Here's my profile
You tell me where you think we are. 

Cars - 2003 souled up beetle, 2008 Luxury SUV, and new nissan, which just replaces a 2000 honda
House mid size in a very nice neighborhood, definitely needs work, nice furniture, but nothing too write home about
$2000 knives 
Other real estate
Mutual fund investments
Stocks, and private investments
Rolex watch
Expensive jewelry, but not a lot of it. 
Target jeans $5, practical clothing
Designer purses
Lots of gadgets and toys
Private school for youngest
Public for oldest
Vacations every year, but often rushed

I feel that most people are better off than we are. In reality I know that we are doing above average.

I think we don't over tangly show it, but we don't hide it either.


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## My Own Advisor (Sep 24, 2012)

We also have a few friends we regularly talk with about net worth, mortgage debt., etc. 

We try not to show it. I prefer to have and behave in line with what Buffett calls an "inner scorecard". That's good enough for me.


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## Four Pillars (Apr 5, 2009)

It is possible for someone to be wealthy AND to show it....

As for older, well-made cars? I would argue that if you have an old car that is still in decent shape - guess what...it was probably well made.


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## Just a Guy (Mar 27, 2012)

I did say that you could be both as well...

I find it funny how some people equate salary/income with wealth. I know many poor well paid individuals (6 figure salaries, yet in debt up to their ears) and I also know many wealthy (multi-millionaire) people who, due to knowing a good accountant (?) or something make next to nothing on paper.

I also wonder if this is a generation thing...older people, having lived under the impact of wars/depression being more frugal than the children of the 60's or the "me" generation...or maybe it's the other way around as you were expected to show wealth in the old days and now people are more laid back...I definitely don't see as many suits and ties at work.


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## Sammi (Nov 12, 2013)

Funny, NONE of my friends talk about net worth, no one talks about salary or money either. I might hear complaints about low pay and no raises etc but no specific numbers.

I know my friends assume I make a lot because of where I work but I don't show it off really. They saw that I bought my own home at 25 (freehold semi-detached) furnished and upgraded so they assumed I had lots of money. But now my financial situation is even better and I rent with less things in a small 1+1 condo.

As for income, it also differs. It's more lifestyle. I hear my friends complain about lower income and no raise yet I see them spend money going out etc. I struggle to understand my friend who gets paid decently but also managed to buy a condo, renovate about $100k into it and sell for a loss just to turn over and buy a $750k freehold townhouse and I wonder how did she qualify for it and how is she still going on vacation twice a year and buy expensive european furniture to dress up her new place. Then I have other friends who I "know" make very little and don't live a crazy extravagant lifestyle but I also know have an investment property and are saving a lot of money because they are frugal so that impresses me.

But overall, no one really talks money, income, net worth. Finance may come up, investments and the like and yeah I can tell how much financial knowledge people have (next to none) when we talk about some stuff like this.


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## RBull (Jan 20, 2013)

No I don't. 

I tend to see those with higher net worth as people who are *generally* more frugal and careful in their decisions on spending, saving and investing. They're also more evidently in control of their lives, and choices, and find it easier to say no.


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## techcrium (Mar 8, 2013)

Plugging Along said:


> Here's my profile
> You tell me where you think we are.
> 
> Cars - 2003 souled up beetle, 2008 Luxury SUV, and new nissan, which just replaces a 2000 honda
> ...


Age and job description/position?


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## Addy (Mar 12, 2010)

We recently sold our one vehicle, a 17 year old Astro van. It more than paid for itself. We purchased a 1 yr old F150 and plan to maintain it well and keep it at least another 15 years. Unfortunately we are now a two-vehicle family due to my husband having a side business where he needs a work / service vehicle and we live in a small town with no bus service. It sucks having two new vehicles on the road, insurance is more, we paid cash for one but still we miss out on the opportunity that could come from that money we put out, and we have a business loan for the work van. I don't like the payments, don't like the higher insurance, but do like driving a newer vehicle. Can't say either of these vehicles are "well made" as in not as good as a mercedes etc but they are good enough for us.


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## briant (Jun 23, 2009)

techcrium said:


> From time to time, I do check on autotrader and fantasize about owning a nicer car. Perhaps a G35 or BMW or something.


Yup me too. Every time I update my net worth, I pretend to shop for a dream car that my savings could buy. Makes me drool a little bit :beguiled: :smug:


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## atrp2biz (Sep 22, 2010)

I think we're on one of the extremes. I'm 34, she's 31. Combined income is about $900k going up ~$100k per year for next 4 years or so. NW is > $2MM. We still rent. We're looking, but nothing is coming up in our desired area. When we do buy, it will be sans mortgage. There's another thread on CMF that goes through our thoughts on what we want to spend on real estate. We drive a 2006 Hyundai Sonata and a 1998 Toyata Sienna. The Sienna still has the cassette deck. We dine out at Ikea and Costco--once in a while at Boston Pizza for the $6.99 kids meal. DW shops at Winners once a year for clothing. My big annual splurge is a golf trip in the winter. We get ignored when we walk thorugh Holt or other high end stores. We just don't look the part. We really don't care and in a way we find it amusing. We do everything ourselves--investments, self-serve car washes, oil changes, etc. I looked into fixing a leaking valve cover on the car myself, by DW talked me out of it, so we spent $2000 to keep the Sonata on the road. At times, I feel our lifestyle is somewhat unhealthy (feel like I'm still in grad school at times) but we feel it's important to give our kids what they need and not everything that they want.


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## Homerhomer (Oct 18, 2010)

OP, I find it surprising that in your world there is no room for people who are not wealthy and at the same time do not try to appear wealthier that they are. Strange world you live in.


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## mbmb (Oct 17, 2012)

I am poor and just took a pay cut, making 35k now. I intersect with very wealthy people at my son’s school. I know they call us “building people” because we do not leave in nice houses like them.
I hope one day I will make a decent pay or improve my income from stock market. Until then, I learn from my son: he doesn’t discriminate based on financial status: he likes or dislikes his peers regardless of their family wealth.


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## Causalien (Apr 4, 2009)

atrp2biz said:


> I think we're on one of the extremes. I'm 34, she's 31. Combined income is about $900k going up ~$100k per year for next 4 years or so. NW is > $2MM. We still rent. We're looking, but nothing is coming up in our desired area. When we do buy, it will be sans mortgage. There's another thread on CMF that goes through our thoughts on what we want to spend on real estate. We drive a 2006 Hyundai Sonata and a 1998 Toyata Sienna. The Sienna still has the cassette deck. We dine out at Ikea and Costco--once in a while at Boston Pizza for the $6.99 kids meal. DW shops at Winners once a year for clothing. My big annual splurge is a golf trip in the winter. We get ignored when we walk thorugh Holt or other high end stores. We just don't look the part. We really don't care and in a way we find it amusing. We do everything ourselves--investments, self-serve car washes, oil changes, etc. I looked into fixing a leaking valve cover on the car myself, by DW talked me out of it, so we spent $2000 to keep the Sonata on the road. At times, I feel our lifestyle is somewhat unhealthy (feel like I'm still in grad school at times) but we feel it's important to give our kids what they need and not everything that they want.


What doc do is still a mystery for all of us. I think at some point even your wife said so. I think wife as a doctor probably make 300k per year? I can only imagine a c level exec making more than $600, but my guess is that doc is an options trader.


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## Just a Guy (Mar 27, 2012)

Homerhomer said:


> OP, I find it surprising that in your world there is no room for people who are not wealthy and at the same time do not try to appear wealthier that they are. Strange world you live in.


Sorry I couldn't sum up all the people in my life into a paragraph or two...then again, they didn't really bear any relevance to the question in my opinion.

You may also note, I didn't state which group I fell into, maybe I'm in that group.


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## andrewf (Mar 1, 2010)

atrp2biz said:


> I think we're on one of the extremes. I'm 34, she's 31. Combined income is about $900k going up ~$100k per year for next 4 years or so. NW is > $2MM. We still rent. We're looking, but nothing is coming up in our desired area. When we do buy, it will be sans mortgage. There's another thread on CMF that goes through our thoughts on what we want to spend on real estate. We drive a 2006 Hyundai Sonata and a 1998 Toyata Sienna. The Sienna still has the cassette deck. We dine out at Ikea and Costco--once in a while at Boston Pizza for the $6.99 kids meal. DW shops at Winners once a year for clothing. My big annual splurge is a golf trip in the winter. We get ignored when we walk thorugh Holt or other high end stores. We just don't look the part. We really don't care and in a way we find it amusing. We do everything ourselves--investments, self-serve car washes, oil changes, etc. I looked into fixing a leaking valve cover on the car myself, by DW talked me out of it, so we spent $2000 to keep the Sonata on the road. At times, I feel our lifestyle is somewhat unhealthy (feel like I'm still in grad school at times) but we feel it's important to give our kids what they need and not everything that they want.


Your NW actually seems low given your income and spending habits.


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## marina628 (Dec 14, 2010)

My business does an event in gaming every year and always 2-3 Billionaire casino owners come every year.A couple years we took this event on a cruise and I played $5.00 Video Poker with one of the Billionaires ,he lost 100 bux and said that's ok I will just sit and enjoy the free drinks to get my money back lol. This same guy who is really a close friend of mine was just in Florida with me and my family last week and we had to take him to Polo so he could buy his 2 for $45 shirts because they are $85 each when he lives.I think personality has lots to do with it ,he was not born into a rich family but made his own money being one of the first online casinos back in the 90s.He cashed out over 2 billion when he put his company on the UK stock exchange.


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## Addy (Mar 12, 2010)

atrp2biz said:


> We drive a 2006 Hyundai Sonata and a 1998 Toyata Sienna. The Sienna still has the cassette deck. We dine out at Ikea and Costco--once in a while at Boston Pizza for the $6.99 kids meal. DW shops at Winners once a year for clothing. My big annual splurge is a golf trip in the winter. We get ignored when we walk thorugh Holt or other high end stores. We just don't look the part. We really don't care and in a way we find it amusing.


I find it amusing as well, you're a couple who has more money in the bank than many/most Holt customers yet they don't bat an eye when you walk in. But the guy in the Armani suit with the Jag could be (most likely is??) in loans past his eyeballs, possibly close to bankruptcy (okay thats a bad judgement call but you get the idea) and they will swoon when he walks in. Could be because clearly he's the one spending money and you are not, so he's a lot easier to talk into spending money than you and your wife.

I love hearing stories about guys who have loads of money and are just average, every day people. Jimmy Pattison in the early 90's, comes into Overwaitea foods with ketchup all over the front of his shirt - he could care less he's out camping for the weekend. I have no clue if JP is like that normally, but I chuckle every time I think of it.


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## atrp2biz (Sep 22, 2010)

2014 expected NI ~$900k
2013 combined NI ~$750k
2012 combined NI ~$500k
2011 combined NI ~$300k
2010 combined NI ~$170k

It's been a steady climb, but only recently has it grown exponentially. We're now past the inflection point and growth will be somewhat logarithmic.


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## marina628 (Dec 14, 2010)

My everyday Jewelry is 4 rings worth over $100,000 and a watch worth about $8500 but most people who have no clue about jewelry probably think it is a $400 watch and a maybe 10k in rings.These days practically everyone in my town live in a $500,000 house so to live in a $700,000 -$800,000 don't impress anyone and almost everyone is driving a $40,000 SUV.Our everyday car is a 2010 Ford Flex Limited ,hubby has a 20111 Ford Mustang GT 500 with custom paint and other stuff he put $80,000 into but after 3 years it still only has 11000 on it so neighbors rarely see it .Actually we really have no neighbors , next door guy has 11 acres and there is a property next to us ,their back yard faces our side yard but in almost 4 years we met the lady one time .


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## Causalien (Apr 4, 2009)

atrp2biz said:


> 2014 expected NI ~$900k
> 2013 combined NI ~$750k
> 2012 combined NI ~$500k
> 2011 combined NI ~$300k
> ...


What $$$ in your opinion is the inflection point for you


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## atrp2biz (Sep 22, 2010)

Inflection represents a change in the rate of growth. 

130
200
250
150
100 going forward

Inflection is at 250 where the rate of change starts to decrease. Remember high school calculus and all those functions you had to draw by hand?


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## Causalien (Apr 4, 2009)

Ah, I read Exponential because so few people talk about logarithmic growth in finance. We are more of the "pump our chest" type.

I meant the inflection point where the income is great enough that it changed your attitude about life from "need to make money" to "made it"


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## techcrium (Mar 8, 2013)

andrewf said:


> Your NW actually seems low given your income and spending habits.


it's likely they graduated medical school at age 28 with some school debt and only began their career then.


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## KaeJS (Sep 28, 2010)

Not to reiterate what I have said in the "Relationship Finance" thread..

But I do a mixture.

I have the Samsung Galaxy Note 3 with a nice case and the Galaxy Gear to match. I get a new phone every year.

However, I haven't really bought clothes for years, and I only buy what is on sale. I never buy name brand. In fact, most of my shirts are custom made or bought in bulk because it's cheap.

Clothes don't make a person....

I have to wear "business" clothing for my job and I absolutely hate it. It makes me think about the football jockey's in highschool who had to wear suits for their games when these people were everything BUT successful.

Anyone can wear a suit.


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## atrp2biz (Sep 22, 2010)

Causalien said:


> I meant the inflection point where the income is great enough that it changed your attitude about life from "need to make money" to "made it"


I don't think we'll have ever "made it". If so, what's after that? What is the drive for success? There will always be a higher number and a bigger title.


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## Just a Guy (Mar 27, 2012)

That's kind of sad...I prefer not worrying about money, titles, etc. but then I never wanted to play the game.

I prefer to volunteer for all the field trips of my kids, being at their sporting events, doing things as a family...raising them as it were.

Taking a nap when I want isn't so bad either...living a life as it were.


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## MoreMiles (Apr 20, 2011)

If you and your wife are MD, your income is dependent on OHIP or its provincial equivalent. You may be too young to know, MD's used to have a cap on their billing. Once you reach that cap, which was around 300k, you are only paid pennies on the dollar. It was the Liberal government that removed that cap. 

So don't take anything for granted.., it may change with a blink of eye, just ask OMA.


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## blin10 (Jun 27, 2011)

it's funny, how in this thread many people keep saying how wealthy act like homeless and poor wear Armani suits... it seems like many are not wealthy at all and for some reason have some type of jealousy towards rich... a ton of people pretend to be rich I agree, but when you see a guy in that BMW or Porsche you DON'T know his situation, so you automatically think to yourself "bla bla he's probably bankrupt showing off but I'm in my sick Toyota corolla with 200k investment portfolio" which is wrong thinking... there are a ton of rich guys who love to enjoy their money, what is the point of making a ton of money and live like a homeless person saving every cent? it's like that dude in this thread making a mill a year and going out to costco lol, are you kidding me? you can get walmart job and do exactly that, what's the point


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## Barwelle (Feb 23, 2011)

atrp2biz said:


> I don't think we'll have ever "made it". If so, what's after that? What is the drive for success? There will always be a higher number and a bigger title.


To quote Mel Gibson: Frreeeddooommm!

More seriously... Financial independence. The freedom of having enough money to spend your days however you want. Who cares about numbers and titles, it shouldn't be about a particular number except the number that enables you to retire. Once you have enough to live the life you want to live without working, with considerable margin for unforeseen circumstances, of course... retirement is after that.

Unless your work and/or titles and/or maximum net worth is your passion in life. In which case, work till you drop. No harm in that, to each their own.


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## peterk (May 16, 2010)

KaeJS said:


> Not to reiterate what I have said in the "Relationship Finance" thread..
> 
> I have the Samsung Galaxy Note 3 with a nice case and the Galaxy Gear to match. I get a new phone every year.
> .
> ...


Clothes make the man far, far more than Galaxy phones make the man, I would argue... :biggrin:


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## Nemo2 (Mar 1, 2012)

peterk said:


> Clothes make the man far, far more than Galaxy phones make the man, I would argue... :biggrin:


"Manners maketh man."

William of Wykeham
(1324 - 1404) 

Motto of Winchester College and New College, Oxford


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## lightcycle (Mar 24, 2012)

I would argue that it's impossible to determine NW from outward trappings. The urge to splurge is equally shared by those who can afford it and those who finance it, and frugality isn't a trait that is exclusive to either rich or poor.

There are many paths to wealth, and I'm very surprised at the frugal-journeyman-millionaire-next-door stereotype that so many on CMF cling to when there are so many ostentatious displays by those that are known to be wealthy.


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## atrp2biz (Sep 22, 2010)

MoreMiles said:


> If you and your wife are MD, your income is dependent on OHIP or its provincial equivalent. You may be too young to know, MD's used to have a cap on their billing. Once you reach that cap, which was around 300k, you are only paid pennies on the dollar. It was the Liberal government that removed that cap.
> 
> So don't take anything for granted.., it may change with a blink of eye, just ask OMA.


There's a reason the cap was removed--they figured out it actually cost more money. Once docs hit the cap, there was no longer an incentive to bill any more for the year. So more doctors were required. More IMGs were brought in with different training standards. More training (which is highly subsidized by gov't) was required. Wait times exploded. 

They won't make that mistake twice.


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## atrp2biz (Sep 22, 2010)

For us, we really enjoy our work. I'm leading a project that will result in a nine-figure swing in the company's bottom line. The result will be binary--win or lose. No in between. I love this pressure.

I don't think I'd rather be doing anything else at this time (but don't tell my boss that!).


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## Dave (Apr 5, 2009)

I am not good at telling the differene since I have met and know all kinds of people, some that show their wealth and others that do not. As long as you can afford it and are happy with your choices, that is what matters. What I hate is that when someone thinks that he or she is wealthier than you and treats you like **** because of it. 

The most outreagous display of wealth that I have seen has been during my one month vacation in Cuba last summer. The cubans are now allowed to come into our resorts and they wear an UNBELIVABLE amount of gold jewelery. Our jaws dropped to the floor. Literally. I was ready to throw away all the gifts I have brought because I felt embarassed. I just had no idea they were so rich. Then on our way back, we met a canadian married to a cuban and he told us that they like to be showy, but that does not necessairly correlate with being wealthy. Surprise...

*To marina*, wow lady ! I will be very honest... I can not tell the difference between a zirconia and a dimond, so unless you are on a red carpet or something I would have never guessed. 

*To atrp2biz*, kudos on the income. Just tell me why do you do so many tasks by yourself ? If you are a high earner who exchanges time for money, you can earn more by outsourcing such tasks to others. In my case, I gave up cleaning and shopping that are very low yield uses of my time. If you own a business, you can use this time to rest or think about how to improve it. Also very precious. The last alternative is that you run something that is pretty much automated with tons of free time and you enjoy doing everything yourself for your pleasure. You have to tell us more  I am mystified.

Dave


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## Jon_Snow (May 20, 2009)

Have to say, one of the more interesting threads in a while.

Won't go into our financials in great detail here but my wife and I are definitely wolves in sheep's clothing. Other than my parents, I don't think anyone has the slightest inkling of our true net worth (hint: not far behind the MD duo).

The cat will be out of the bag when I ER at 42, my wife soon to follow. Sure we could have had all the "trappings", but have instead spent our money at a distinctly lower middle class level. I get pangs for a nice German sports coupe once in a while, but the madness passes quickly. We decided early on that financial independence at an early age was our number 1 priority. This has meant looking decidedly non-rich for the past dozen years. Wouldn't change a thing.


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## atrp2biz (Sep 22, 2010)

I'll describe my last oil change.

My four-year old son and I changed into our ragged clothes. He hands me my socket wrench as I reach underneath to unscrew the oil pan. Once open, we sat in the sun with a beer and chocolate milk in hand. We eventually got around to changing the oil filter and screwing back on the oil pan screw. I pour the fresh oil into the car. We then poured the old oil into the empty oil jug while he held it steady. We then took a drive to the fire station to drop off the old oil. [Note: he got a LEGO fire station for Christmas] 

Like I said, I really do enjoy changing my own oil.


The last time we went to a self-serve car wash....


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## Brian Weatherdon CFP (Jan 18, 2011)

I enjoy living modestly ...and that includes NOT investing overly in anything that rusts. I noticed a lot of accountants drive Toyotas while their clients drive more expensive cars. What do you suppose about this?  I believe most people who have some wealth don't wish to particularly show it. Or at least I've known this to be true.


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## Dave (Apr 5, 2009)

It means that the clients are wealthier than the accountants who work for them ?


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## the_apprentice (Jan 31, 2013)

I spend my money wisely; that means I eat healthy home cooked food everyday and I rarely spend money on alcohol. Once people know what you make or have, they become jealous. That's why I choose to never speak about money with anybody (except this forum/family members).

At 26, I manage to go on 2 vacations a year, I own a new car, a condo, and I spend money on aesthetically pleasing fashion. I look middle-class (not rich) and always stay humble.


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## tygrus (Mar 13, 2012)

the_apprentice said:


> At 26, I manage to go on 2 vacations a year, I own a new car, a condo, and I spend money on aesthetically pleasing fashion. I look middle-class (not rich) and always stay humble.


If I could go back in time, this is what I would do. When I got my first paychecks, I started partying harder and spent a lot of wasted cash carousing and chasing women. Very poor investment. It wasn't even that much fun.


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## richard (Jun 20, 2013)

I wonder how much of the faked wealth is related to the Bill Cosby joke where he says to a daughter "Remember, your parents are rich but you have nothing." It turns out that you can pretend to afford the life you grew up with... for a while. Then again some things are just a situational requirement. If someone wears a $5,000 suit it might be because someone else told them to and they decided that they had no choice. As the saying goes Wall Street is where people arrive in a limo to get advice from someone who came to work on the subway (and probably wearing an expensive suit too).

I can't answer the original question since I wouldn't say that I'm wealthy. But to help my cause I own a car with over 20 years of experience (it must have been built well), rent an apartment at a relatively low cost despite being a nice place in a great location, and have over 95% of my assets either invested or on the way there. I do have enough to spend more than the minimum on a few things that really matter. Sometimes that just means buying nice foods and spending the time to make a meal that you can't get at any restaurant around here.


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## MoreMiles (Apr 20, 2011)

atrp2biz said:


> I'll describe my last oil change.
> 
> My four-year old son and I changed into our ragged clothes. He hands me my socket wrench as I reach underneath to unscrew the oil pan. Once open, we sat in the sun with a beer and chocolate milk in hand. We eventually got around to changing the oil filter and screwing back on the oil pan screw. I pour the fresh oil into the car. We then poured the old oil into the empty oil jug while he held it steady. We then took a drive to the fire station to drop off the old oil. [Note: he got a LEGO fire station for Christmas]
> 
> ...


Your MD professional time is billable at $400 per hour. You use it to do something that $40 can take care of at most garages. You actually lost $360 by doing it yourself. Wouldn't it be better if you use the $360 differential to bring your son to Legoland and buy him tons of Lego? It's more bonding and more enjoyable, at least to your son.


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## nathan79 (Feb 21, 2011)

MoreMiles said:


> Your MD professional time is billable at $400 per hour. You use it to do something that $40 can take care of at most garages. You actually lost $360 by doing it yourself. Wouldn't it be better if you use the $360 differential to bring your son to Legoland and buy him tons of Lego? It's more bonding and more enjoyable, at least to your son.


That's assuming he'd rather work every minute of his day. Besides, the kid might learn something useful by watching him change his own oil.

I really think some people take the whole "time is money" philosophy a bit too far. Personally, I enjoy doing stuff versus paying people to do it for me. Much more satisfying.


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## nahc (Feb 22, 2011)

blin10 said:


> it's funny, how in this thread many people keep saying how wealthy act like homeless and poor wear Armani suits... it seems like many are not wealthy at all and for some reason have some type of jealousy towards rich... a ton of people pretend to be rich I agree, but when you see a guy in that BMW or Porsche you DON'T know his situation, so you automatically think to yourself "bla bla he's probably bankrupt showing off but I'm in my sick Toyota corolla with 200k investment portfolio" which is wrong thinking... there are a ton of rich guys who love to enjoy their money, what is the point of making a ton of money and live like a homeless person saving every cent? it's like that dude in this thread making a mill a year and going out to costco lol, are you kidding me? you can get walmart job and do exactly that, what's the point


I don't assume anything other than s/he owns BMW/Porsche or whatever and that their tastes are probably more luxurious than mine. The reason I live this way is merely because I think when people are "hungry" the drive to success is greater. I also found out a long time ago that none of that stuff makes me happy for very long and conversely the maintenance kills me. 

I think I'm pretty successfully and I hope my kids will be too, but if they are not, at least they are accustomed to living frugally. The other way is rough. Pizza on a caviar budget is easy. The kids will find being a poor student easy.

Why do I work hard then just to live frugally? Because I feel that we are all in this world to make this world a better place, and if you just live on to just have fun then you're a waste of oxygen. Because I want my kids to work hard and live frugally (maybe a little less frugally than me and DH, I think Costco is expensive). Or maybe because it's so ingrained in me I can't do any else (blame MY parents). The $$ is an easy, indirect way to keep score (Buffet thinks the same).



MoreMiles said:


> Your MD professional time is billable at $400 per hour. You use it to do something that $40 can take care of at most garages. You actually lost $360 by doing it yourself.


I would rather not spend all of my time doing medicine. Enough is enough. Also, you may also consider that there isn't enough work to occupy all your time 24 hours and this time would be considered opportunity cost. I could be vacationing or at the mall or sleeping earning $0 but instead I'm (well, DH is) teaching my son something about cars-- but more importantly repairing stuff. Doing investments and taxes yourself -- even as an exercise -- you learn a lot about money (enough to make the accountants and lawyers double-check their work before handing over their stuff). Learning to grocery shop/cook is also an important life skill. It's also quality family time! (Whereas the practice of medicine is not). I admit I outsourced the cleaning a long time ago because I don't get a lot out of it.*

*I got pretty mad at the Montessori teachers who insist on teaching my son "useful life skills" like setting the table, cleaning windows and such. I rather they teach him math and reading properly so I don't have to spend so much of my time doing it myself (it's not that enjoyable for the both of us either...) You can argue I can outsource that as well but then what my sons and I do together if we don't cook, shop and practice reading and math? I'm pretty proud that my four-year-old boy looks for discounts and knows when items are expensive or cheap (and to buy it when cheap).



MoreMiles said:


> Wouldn't it be better if you use the $360 differential to bring your son to Legoland and buy him tons of Lego? It's more bonding and more enjoyable, at least to your son.


I'm not here as a parent to do what's enjoyable for the kids. That's what grandparents are for. I'm here to try and teach them useful life skills, even if it's hard. (sorry, I'll get off the soapbox now)


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## Nemo2 (Mar 1, 2012)

nahc said:


> I'm not here as a parent to do what's enjoyable for the kids. That's what grandparents are for. I'm here to try and teach them useful life skills, even if it's hard.


+1


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## fraser (May 15, 2010)

We drive a 2006 Accord and a 1997 Camry. The latter will soon be given to our son. We never discuss our net worth with anyone especially relatives. We do not have an ostentatious lifestyle. It is contrary to our Scottish Presbyterian upbringing.

So, when looking for a fee for service financial advisor we came across one who we liked AND in conversation he told us that he was looking for a used 4 year old Volvo wagon. I liked that. We deal with his boss who just told us that he treated himself to a new Audi sports car...well at least one that was four years old so he would not have to eat the depreciation. We like that kind of advisor. And he is taking care of our investments in the same manner.


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## Just a Guy (Mar 27, 2012)

I once knew a woman who's father was a physician, and made good money...she told me once that she'd rather have had less "stuff" and more time with him. The idea of the oil change is great, but if it's only once in a while...

I prefer to generate enough passive income that I everyday can be like that. 

True, my kids may not like it some days (because I too believe you're there to teach them and not always have fun), but they have a ton of life skills, a good work ethic, and are turning out pretty good. I never gave them an allowance, though they are spoiled in my opinion, but I gave them ways to earn money and taught them about business and investing. They also had to shop for all the things we need and learned the value of a dollar, as well as things like cooking and cleaning. This made them aware of how much it takes to get things, and they aren't into expensive clothes and things by choice. They will save to but things they want like iPads, but they don't do designer clothes. Most people who encounter them are amazed at their work habits and skills, asking how I get them to do things when their kids sit around and can only be motivated by Pavlovian "treats"...I told them they were raised to be part of a family, it's just expected. Other kids don't seem to act like them, but then they are usually the ones who sent them to someone else to raise them (daycare, after school care, nannies, etc). 

Why have them if you're not going to raise them?


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## Eclectic12 (Oct 20, 2010)

Just a Guy said:


> I hang out with a wide variety of people, some very wealthy, some not. ...
> So, the question is, if your one of the higher net worth kind of people, do you show it off, or would you fit more into the group I know?


With the median salary for the world being around $2K a year, I'd argue that almost everyone in Canada is "high net worth" ... 


... not sure if I fit in with what your thinking but the happier ones I know fit more with the group you know. 


Cheers


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## daddybigbucks (Jan 30, 2011)

tygrus said:


> If I could go back in time, this is what I would do. When I got my first paychecks, I started partying harder and spent a lot of wasted cash carousing and chasing women. Very poor investment. It wasn't even that much fun.


really?
I did the exact same as you. 
Although it would have been nice to invest 20% of my paychecks for the future that would defeat the purpose of living in reckless abandon.

I felt all that money wasted in strip clubs and booze/dope got my ya-yas out and now i only social drink and find bars very dull.

I know friends who acted very mature in their 20's, but they are the same way in their 40's but have trouble committing to a relationship or still drink pretty heavy given the chance.

you cant change your past, so try to see the positive.


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## Eclectic12 (Oct 20, 2010)

Just a Guy said:


> ... I find it funny how some people equate salary/income with wealth. I know many poor well paid individuals (6 figure salaries, yet in debt up to their ears) and I also know many wealthy (multi-millionaire) people who, due to knowing a good accountant (?) or something make next to nothing on paper.


+1 ... the extreme example was my co-worker who was constantly buying something & then selling it a year later as he had to buy the newer model that had more features.




> ... I also wonder if this is a generation thing...older people, having lived under the impact of wars/depression being more frugal than the children of the 60's or the "me" generation...or maybe it's the other way around as you were expected to show wealth in the old days and now people are more laid back...I definitely don't see as many suits and ties at work.


I suspect it's more complicated than that ... some of the kids who had good communication with their parents who lived through the depression have a similar idea to be frugal. Then too, those who have seen how the rest of the world lives can have different ideas than their generation.


Interesting idea about those in the past expected to show wealth ... not sure about it though.


The constant I've observed is that most start with idea that what they are experiencing is normal for both their generation & the world. Those who are interested in learning about more than themselves quickly see lots of contradiction of this.


Cheers


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## uptoolate (Oct 9, 2011)

fraser said:


> It is contrary to our Scottish Presbyterian upbringing.


So I can blame my grandmothers! Probably true to some extent. Grandparents who lived through the depression, parents who were born into it or just before and lived through the war. I think the idea of quality time with the children doing useful things and trying to teach them the value of a work ethic, personal responsibility and taking pride in simple things done well is incredibly important. So many of the messages they receive and the external role models they see are espousing such contrary messages. Life can be hard and we try to live frugally for many reasons but one is certainly to try to avoid having our children feel that they are entitled. I'm afraid that a rude awakening awaits many who have grown up swaddled in our debt laden, Madison Avenue inspired society.


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## RBull (Jan 20, 2013)

nathan79 said:


> That's assuming he'd rather work every minute of his day. Besides, the kid might learn something useful by watching him change his own oil.
> 
> I really think some people take the whole "time is money" philosophy a bit too far. Personally, I enjoy doing stuff versus paying people to do it for me. Much more satisfying.


Can't agree more. The boy probably loves helping his dad do a REAL chore. Why spend $360 on more stuff vs. teaching a valuable lesson and getting some personal satisfaction as well?


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## uptoolate (Oct 9, 2011)

+1 On both of the above comments.


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## Jagas (Feb 11, 2013)

We are a bit of a mix and I have no clue what friends or neighbors might even think. 
Modest home (<2K sq ft, 45+ years old) but very well furnished (definition dependent).
Very modest cars (13 and 8 years old, basic Japanese models) but most days what I am wearing cost more than the current value of my car.
Very simple vacations but kids are in private school.
We have no problem spending when we want but we are doing pretty well to sock away for retirement (15-20 years away targeting age 60+/-) as well. NW about $1M, mortgage is only debt and will be long gone within the next 5 years, so not terribly wealthy but definitely not hurting.


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## Causalien (Apr 4, 2009)

I was showing someone wealthy around town once and at one point he pointed out this French couple and said to me: "You see those two? They are super wealthy." He told me that he know from their clothing, but the clothing just look like normal t shirt and chinos for me. I trust what this guy said because he's been around wealthy people for a long time so he can probably smell money from a mile away. So I kept looking. Lo and behold, I noticed the backpack the guy has on his back. The construction of it and the material used is not trivial and confirmed his observation. 

So I think, no matter how hard you try to hide, your cloth will always give you away... or something.


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## KrissyFair (Jul 8, 2013)

Wow, I'm late to this thread but it's been very fun to read. Especially the tangents.

A bunch of years ago, DH and I had this conversation a lot. I was having some career turmoil and we were getting ready to start a family, so essentially we expected to be a one-income family for a while. He looked at his friends who were mostly in double engineer couples (ie high income very early) and saw them buying massive houses while we still rented. So he had a sizeable chip on his shoulder about what he considered our comparative poverty because I put all of our money towards our student loans at that time. But through the years, he's listened to tid bits they've all said and has slowly realized that many of them are not in great financial places in spite of the trappings. One couple has to have a lodger in their house (not a basement renter, a live-in, eat in your kitchen next to you and your toddler kind of lodger) to make ends meet, in spite of earning more than us. Another bought a gorgeous house in a very trendy Toronto neighbourhood, but had to wait 2 years to furnish it while they paid off the credit card bills from their wedding. Then one day there was a conversation about career paths and future plans etc. and I mentioned to them that I'm making DH retire when he's 50 to go fishing for a living and... let's just say I had a couple of offers of marriage that day  So it's true, you never can tell.


Also, re:


atrp2biz said:


> Remember high school calculus and all those functions you had to draw by hand?


Good grief, thanks for the flashbacks. *shudder*


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## Jagas (Feb 11, 2013)

Plugging Along said:


> Here's my profile
> You tell me where you think we are.
> 
> Cars - 2003 souled up beetle, 2008 Luxury SUV, and new nissan, which just replaces a 2000 honda
> ...


I'd guess a smidge under $1.5M, maybe just over if we factor in the purses.


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## marina628 (Dec 14, 2010)

I will share something with you guys about why I have such expensive Jewelry .The main reason is I worked really hard and .My husband and I spent our early years just scraping by so we really know the value of money and security.I spent many years being treated like second class citizen by sister in laws and back in the 90s when they would basically rub their 5k diamonds(which they thought was alot) in my face as if I would never be able to afford them I kept notes .IN fact my one sister-in-law with a grade 9 education would have nothing if she didn't marry a really hard working guy.My business became so much bigger than I could ever dream , I remembered the first month I made more than my husband would make in a entire year.We were extremely discrete about the fact I was earning over 1 million a year ,we never took anything for granted and nothing changed.
One evening about 5 years ago all the family were together and they were talking about when they would retire ,my husband was 41 at that time and when it got to him he said probably next year.This same sister in law laughed in his face and said you will never be able to retire before your brothers.Let's just say she motivated me to make sure that my husband would be able to retire.Same year we all went to Vegas and we went into Tiffany and I tried on a ring set that was $73,000 USD and she actually laughed in my face and said keep dreaming. Well my passive aggressive self said I will show you *****.So this year for our 25th anniversary my husband bought me that ring set actually mine is a tad bit better 
Well I wish I could freeze the moment she seen those rings ,the $40,000 ring I bought in 2010 she could barely stand to look at and of course i had to put mine F color diamond next to her nearly yellow Q color lol
She could barely look at my rings everyone else admired them and was very happy for us but she just looked like she was going to keel over .So I love diamonds and I spend a good couple hours a day looking at them in different light but everything we have now is bigger than hers and it kills her.Of course she could have done what I did with education and working hard but she is just a nasty housewife who can't keep more than 1 friend at a time because she is always putting people down.I am sure we all have one of those in our life ,my husband's entire family are in awe of what I have done and genuinely really happy for us but this one is eating crow lol


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## Just a Guy (Mar 27, 2012)

Marina, 

I understand where you are coming from. I too have been treated that way by family, however that's where we differ. Instead of trying to show them up, I just pity them and their lifestyle. I never felt the need to stoop to their level. If it makes them feel better to look down on me, that's okay, I don't live with them and don't need to spend a ton of time with them.

They can pull out all the bling they want, it's never appealed to me. If it makes them feel good to waste money on rocks or cars or other silly things that they feel is important, that's their right...

They lead a shallow life, I prefer a rich one.


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## lightcycle (Mar 24, 2012)

marina628 said:


> I will share something with you guys about why I have such expensive Jewelry


I don't think you need to explain yourself or apologize at all.

Most of the people here are of a specific mindset that demonizes conspicuous consumption (even if it's well within your means) and deifies an ascetic lifestyle as the primary means to amass great wealth. It's the kind of people the subject matter of this message board attracts. However, just as many on here condemn the flaunting of money, there's also an air of holier-than-thou-because-I-CHOOSE-not-to-show it attitude that filters through.

Make yourself happy first. If others have a problem with you enjoying it, it's on them, not you.


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## Jagas (Feb 11, 2013)

lightcycle said:


> Make yourself happy first. If others have a problem with you enjoying it, it's on them, not you.


+1


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## marina628 (Dec 14, 2010)

Well I like Rocks and Hubby likes cars but we are in a good place because we really can't think of anything else we want or need so there will be alot more saving moving forward.We have plans to sell a few things in next 3-4 years like our waterfront cottage and boat we bought 6 years ago because we want to spend summers in Newfoundland with my family .We have a nice big country house , perfect house for extended family grand kids etc so this house is our forever house now.


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## marina628 (Dec 14, 2010)

Everything is relative I suppose , I won enough to buy 3 of these rings in 2013 playing poker .


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## lightcycle (Mar 24, 2012)

Oh my god, you're wealthy and you spend money!?!? How is that possible?!?!?

You're going to give the folks on here a coronary!


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## marina628 (Dec 14, 2010)

I do my part to save the economy , in 2010 we spent over 1 million dollars cash buy stuff


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## lightcycle (Mar 24, 2012)

Okay, let's not go overboard or I'll have to defect to the other side out of sheer envy...

But seriously, good on you for enjoying the fruits of your labour and/or good fortune!


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## marina628 (Dec 14, 2010)

Not overboard we bought two cars in our biz and one personal , a truck for my parents , I bought my parents a Manufactured home for $130,000 to use as a summer cabin and they really love that.We spent almost $200,000 at home depot stores on renovations on rentals and we built a place ourselves .The rest is a blur right now but it was relatively painless as some came again from poker winnings and we sold some property ,bought others etc.And my business bought about $5000 in Grey Goose Vodka lol


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## My Own Advisor (Sep 24, 2012)

Sounds like the good life marina and you've worked hard for it. Might as well enjoy it


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## peterk (May 16, 2010)

Diamonds, designer backpacks, purses and clothes are still a "cheap" way to flaunt your wealth IMO. 100k on diamonds that you wear contantly and everyone can see is sure better use of money than a 100k car that will only be nice for 5 years, or a 100k more expensive home that's barely different than the cheaper one...

Last time I was in Edmonton I took a walk downtown and sat on the park bench across from the entrance to the Fairmont Hotel. Tons and tons of luxury cars pulling in constantly: Maseratis, Range Rovers, Bentleys, lexus, I think the cheapest car I saw was a nice Subaru. In 9/10 cars pulling up the people stepping out were dressed like crap! Old jeans, ill-fitting shirts, windbreakers (seriously), sneakers. The horror! I wanted to scream "Dude! Go spend $90,000 on your car instead of $100,000 and buy some f$*#ing proper clothes!"

Anyways. Not sure what my point is.... I guess it's that rich people aren't any smarter at "showing their wealth" than poor people are, and do a bunch of stupid **** just like everyone else does haha.


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## Causalien (Apr 4, 2009)

Marina's flaunting might be a bit excessive though. I'd be afraid of getting robbed all the time. That fear is not worth the feeling of superiority IMO. Last time I have to carry an item worth $30k on my person, I asked a buddy to escort me... and that's without flaunting it in public. 

Old habit dies hard I guess. I still hasn't adjusted back to the fact that Canada is a relatively safe place and everyone in Vancouver is filthy rich. They wouldn't blink for $1 mil.


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## KrissyFair (Jul 8, 2013)

marina628 said:


> So this year for our 25th anniversary my husband bought me that ring set actually mine is a tad bit better
> Well I wish I could freeze the moment she seen those rings


@marina You so rock my world. I'm also the kind of person who would love that moment. Well done.


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## lightcycle (Mar 24, 2012)

If it's excessive for you, that's your line drawn in the sand and you don't have to cross it.

But to make a value judgment like "because it's not good for me, it's not good for anyone else" is narrow-minded.

For some people, driving an expensive, quickly depreciating car makes them feel good about themselves. Even if they're wearing shitty-looking clothes. Why begrudge them their happiness? Just make yourself happy and don't carry $30K on you, drive a 20-year old car and wear really nice clothes instead.

Just make yourself happy.


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## heyjude (May 16, 2009)

If Marina can afford the bling ring and enjoys wearing it, why not? 

Personally, I get equal enjoyment out of my $400 sapphire and diamond ring that I bought duty free in the Caribbean, or my $200 amethyst bracelet. At those prices I can afford to buy a variety of jewelry pieces. Friends have remarked that I am always wearing something interesting. But I have no desire to upstage anyone. And I left all of it at home in the safe when I went on a Caribbean vacation recently. One less thing to worry about.


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## Homerhomer (Oct 18, 2010)

This has turned into a real girly thread about who has the biggest diamond, so boys, anyone willing to start a thread about who has the biggest pee pee ;-)


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## Nemo2 (Mar 1, 2012)

Homerhomer said:


> This has turned into a real girly thread about who has the biggest diamond, so boys, anyone willing to start a thread about who has the biggest pee pee ;-)


I'm out.


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## OnlyMyOpinion (Sep 1, 2013)

Our only advise to any of you with nice jewellery is take good pictures, keep receipts and ensure that your insurance coverage matches the current appraised value (or provides replacement value if possible). Better yet, keep it in a solid immovable safe when its not on you.
We had the misfortune of experiencing a home robbery last fall. Very surgical, took only the good jewellery. They left at the back as she came in the front. 
We didn't think we were 'jewellery endowed', these were all pieces bought an anniversary at a time, over many years, but always good pieces. We did have photos and receipts which helped the insurance process immensely. But the short of it was that the appraised replacement value exceeded the policy limit for jewellery by about 1/3.:disgust:


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## Nemo2 (Mar 1, 2012)

OnlyMyOpinion said:


> took only the good jewellery.


In the bedroom?


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## marina628 (Dec 14, 2010)

I have insurance for my jewelry ,cost $700 a year but obviously have to use it.For the record my jewelry appraisal price is about double of what I paid for them.Even the places who claim to not offer discounts will do it when you walk in ready to deal .


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## OnlyMyOpinion (Sep 1, 2013)

Nemo2 said:


> In the bedroom?


After 33 years of trouble free neighbourhood complacency, where else would we keep it :upset:


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## Nemo2 (Mar 1, 2012)

marina628 said:


> For the record my jewelry appraisal price is about double of what I paid for them.


Pretty much S.O.P.

http://www.diamonds2cash.com/appraisal/


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## Nemo2 (Mar 1, 2012)

OnlyMyOpinion said:


> After 33 years of trouble free neighbourhood complacency, where else would we keep it :upset:


It's always the first place they hit.


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## Causalien (Apr 4, 2009)

lightcycle said:


> If it's excessive for you, that's your line drawn in the sand and you don't have to cross it.
> 
> But to make a value judgment like "because it's not good for me, it's not good for anyone else" is narrow-minded.
> 
> ...


Nah, it's not that. I am more thinking out loud about safety reasons. I thought I was pretty clear about it in the post. Flaunting cars is better than flaunting jewelry from safety standpoint. Car is a lot harder to rob than jewelry, though it does make you a target, albeit a moving one. Not to mention the personal danger that might be associated with a stick up while walking. So, there's some kind of clash of world here. In my point of view, anything you wear on yourself above $1000, heck even $500 will surely make you a prime stick up candidate. But from what most of the reply is telling me, this is not true in Canada. 

Perhaps it is just me since I often have to go to dangerous places in different parts of the world. I've been told many times to hide certain things by my hosts and have developed this innate sense of safety. Marina's 3 big jewels just raises all sorts of red flags and is a guaranteed robbery in most part of the world. I am just surprised that you guys think this is normal. I mean, I'd accessorize myself in white tie events, but not in day to day living. So seems to me it is enabled by the relative safety of Canada.


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## lightcycle (Mar 24, 2012)

Causalien said:


> heck even $500 will surely make you a prime stick up candidate. But from what most of the reply is telling me, this is not true in Canada.


Maybe true in Downtown Eastside.

Also, I wouldn't trust those lowlifes living in West Van either...


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## donald (Apr 18, 2011)

I looked @ tiffany website(the new york one,via my investment acct,under tif symbol)
I thought the 10k pieces look ridiculous lol(i couldn't even find the 75k pieces)that is some serious jewellery you have marina!
Even if i was a multi-millionaire(maybe because of my up bringing)i'd be scared to even walk into a place like that,i'd have the fear the salesman would look @ me and say something or signal to the security guard lol


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## heyjude (May 16, 2009)

Homerhomer said:


> This has turned into a real girly thread about who has the biggest diamond, so boys, anyone willing to start a thread about who has the biggest pee pee ;-)


Diamonds are a girl's best friend!


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## Plugging Along (Jan 3, 2011)

Jagas said:


> I'd guess a smidge under $1.5M, maybe just over if we factor in the purses.


Pretty close, we are over the last time I calculator my networth, but that was last year. I don't factor vehicles, purses, or jewelry, otherwise, it would be a lot over.

Does a make a difference that most of my jewelry was given to me, and same with my Rolex (not by spouse either). Yeah, the shoes and purses I bought, but all at a very reduced rate. :chuncky:



peterk said:


> Diamonds, designer backpacks, purses and clothes are still a "cheap" way to flaunt your wealth IMO. 100k on diamonds that you wear contantly and everyone can see is sure better use of money than a 100k car that will only be nice for 5 years, or a 100k more expensive home that's barely different than the cheaper one...
> 
> Last time I was in Edmonton I took a walk downtown and sat on the park bench across from the entrance to the Fairmont Hotel. Tons and tons of luxury cars pulling in constantly: Maseratis, Range Rovers, Bentleys, lexus, I think the cheapest car I saw was a nice Subaru. In 9/10 cars pulling up the people stepping out were dressed like crap! Old jeans, ill-fitting shirts, windbreakers (seriously), sneakers. The horror! I wanted to scream "Dude! Go spend $90,000 on your car instead of $100,000 and buy some f$*#ing proper clothes!"
> 
> Anyways. Not sure what my point is.... I guess it's that rich people aren't any smarter at "showing their wealth" than poor people are, and do a bunch of stupid **** just like everyone else does haha.


I don't think showing or not showing your wealth is about being stupid, or smart, it is about personal preference. 

I know really wealthy, 9 digit net worth people, and they look it. 

I also know other wealthy people that don't. One oil and gas exec I know had the older so 1997 accord in the parking lot. He looks at it as a badge of honor, where as he staff all have $80k vehicles or more. He doesn't care for the material stuff, but when it comes to his kids, their is no expense they have spared. 

I wear cheap jeans and clothes but am always presentable, and dressed for the occasion. Then I have my indulgences. 




Causalien said:


> Nah, it's not that. I am more thinking out loud about safety reasons. I thought I was pretty clear about it in the post. Flaunting cars is better than flaunting jewelry from safety standpoint. Car is a lot harder to rob than jewelry, though it does make you a target, albeit a moving one. Not to mention the personal danger that might be associated with a stick up while walking. So, there's some kind of clash of world here. In my point of view, anything you wear on yourself above $1000, heck even $500 will surely make you a prime stick up candidate. But from what most of the reply is telling me, this is not true in Canada.
> 
> Perhaps it is just me since I often have to go to dangerous places in different parts of the world. I've been told many times to hide certain things by my hosts and have developed this innate sense of safety. Marina's 3 big jewels just raises all sorts of red flags and is a guaranteed robbery in most part of the world. I am just surprised that you guys think this is normal. I mean, I'd accessorize myself in white tie events, but not in day to day living. So seems to me it is enabled by the relative safety of Canada.


I don't think it's that much more dangerous, I am sure marina is not waving around her three rings Ina third world country. In fact, when something is really expensive like jewelry, people will assume its fake if they don't know better or are far away. It's hard to fake a Bentley or Ferrari and people can spot them a mile away.


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## richard (Jun 20, 2013)

Jagas said:


> most days what I am wearing cost more than the current value of my car.


Haha, I would say the same if I spent a little more on clothes, wore a watch, etc. But at least my glasses were 1/3 of the price of my car!


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## richard (Jun 20, 2013)

marina628 said:


> Everything is relative I suppose , I won enough to buy 3 of these rings in 2013 playing poker .


Was your business somehow related to poker/gaming?


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## richard (Jun 20, 2013)

peterk said:


> Last time I was in Edmonton I took a walk downtown and sat on the park bench across from the entrance to the Fairmont Hotel. Tons and tons of luxury cars pulling in constantly: Maseratis, Range Rovers, Bentleys, lexus, I think the cheapest car I saw was a nice Subaru. In 9/10 cars pulling up the people stepping out were dressed like crap! Old jeans, ill-fitting shirts, windbreakers (seriously), sneakers. The horror! I wanted to scream "Dude! Go spend $90,000 on your car instead of $100,000 and buy some f$*#ing proper clothes!"


Maybe they like the vehicle but don't care what they wear (or want minimal inconvenience to pick it out, clean it, etc). If they can afford it all it's really their choice  I sort of understand the appeal of really expensive clothes if they're well-made, but I don't know if I would put in the time even if the cost didn't matter.


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## richard (Jun 20, 2013)

Causalien said:


> Car is a lot harder to rob than jewelry, though it does make you a target, albeit a moving one.


If you wear the jewelry frequently, you spend a lot more time away from the car than the jewelry. It's probably easier to steal something when no one is around...


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## Just a Guy (Mar 27, 2012)

When I had to wear nice clothes, I found them uncomfortable...I actually prefer T-shirts/casual shirts and jeans...plus, I rarely found nice clothes to be very warm...something I find important this time of year. Now, I also like my nicer leather jackets and stuff...but I dress for comfort and utility more often than to impress others.


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## larry81 (Nov 22, 2010)

No i dont


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## warp (Sep 4, 2010)

Janus said:


> I really enjoy conversations on this topic. There does indeed seem to be a fundamental difference between the actually wealthy and those trying to look prosperous.
> 
> I'm certainly not wealthy, but I'm 27 with $110k in net assets making $100k/yr so I think I'm on the wealthier side for my cohort.
> 
> ...



Janus:

That's a great start, ( though I'd trade all my "net worth" to be your age again).

For whatever it's worth, here's a bit of advice.

Live within your means..never over them. Avoid debt to buy things that might make you look "wealthy".

Always save...and invest wisely for the future, which will come much sooner than you think. My advice would be to buy solid dividend stocks with a history of increasing their dividend. If investing is hard for you, simply buy some low fee ETF's......and avoid holding large amounts of cash over time.

And lastly, steer as clear as you can of any woman who seems interested in spending your money for you, no matter how lovely she may seems.

Good luck.


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## Nemo2 (Mar 1, 2012)

^ lots of +1s there, Warp.


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## Janus (Oct 23, 2013)

warp said:


> Janus:
> 
> Live within your means..never over them. Avoid debt to buy things that might make you look "wealthy".
> 
> ...


Don't worry I won't fall off the rails. Motivation remains high, I'm saving as much as I can and investing is both my job and my hobby. I can't shell away my money into equities fast enough. Also I come from a family that despised debt and was always frugal, so it's ingrained already. 

I'll take the relationship advice to heart. Back on topic with the thread, if I don't show my net worth over time then maybe I won't attract the wrong types!


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## hboy43 (May 10, 2009)

Hi:

Most of the time I dress such that I could sleep under a bridge ... and look like I belong there. Much to the annoyance of my wife.

hboy43


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## Calgary_Girl (Apr 20, 2011)

Just a Guy said:


> When I had to wear nice clothes, I found them uncomfortable...I actually prefer T-shirts/casual shirts and jeans...plus, I rarely found nice clothes to be very warm...something I find important this time of year. Now, I also like my nicer leather jackets and stuff...but I dress for comfort and utility more often than to impress others.


+1 

My sister thinks I'm adopted because I prefer to wear jeans and comfy shoes vs. the latest trend from the top designers. I argue that I'm a stay at home mom so what's the point of dressing up but she feels that one should look good even when going to the grocery store :rolleyes2:

As for showing our networth, we do live in an expensive neighbourhood ($900K + homes) but our cars are pretty basic - hubby drives a 2001 Toyota 4Runner with 130K clicks on it and I drive a 2013 Dodge Caravan to haul the kids around. The only way someone would have a slight inkling that we have money is by looking at our house or maybe my wedding ring set which is around $15K. I'm 41 and hubby just turned 44 and our networth just crossed the $2 million mark.


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## marina628 (Dec 14, 2010)

richard said:


> Was your business somehow related to poker/gaming?


No we had a marketing /media company although many online casinos were our clients.


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## Ponderling (Mar 1, 2013)

Basic 4 bedroom house well located in suburbia is fully paid for. Was when we were 42/44. Probaly the last house within 10 each way that does not have a yard service. Shovel my own snow too. 

'Needs' new siding - 40yo white aluminum has almost no white left on it. Will replace it when we upgrade the insulation under it to reduce utility costs next summer.

Investments all rolled up, house incuded to about 1.5M. 

Clothing is frequently worn to exhaustion. Kids wear hand me downs freqently. It did not kill me, they will also survive.

We take brown bag lunches in to work all the time. the lengths of my food frugality lives under another long thread. 

Walk or bike to work when I can fitr it to my schedule constriants. 

I don't count cars as assets- they in fact are a bit of a cash pit at times. 

Car 1 2001 Buick Regal. Car 2 2009 Dodge Calibre. Occasional use truck 2004 Dodge Dakota. 

Usually low key vacations; canoe camping, etc. Planning a week in Paris in the spring is by far the biggest 'mainstream' vacation we have ever considered. 

I do casually mention we have paid off our mortgage if the subject comes up among friends. Otherwise we keep our wealth building progress pretty low on other peoples radar.


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## Causalien (Apr 4, 2009)

richard said:


> If you wear the jewelry frequently, you spend a lot more time away from the car than the jewelry. It's probably easier to steal something when no one is around...


Who cares about having the car stolen while you are away? That's what insurance is for. The thing that is missed, is that robbing your jewelry happens when you are in direct danger.


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