# When Do You Just Quit



## Berubeland (Sep 6, 2009)

Blah, blah, blah, dealing with a sociopath really sucks and bad things will happen to you


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## summer (Jul 7, 2011)

I don't have any advice other than wait until you calm down before you make any decisions.
You have every right to be furious. This lady sounds like she has major mental problems.


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## Plugging Along (Jan 3, 2011)

Oh Rachael, I am so sorry that you have had to deal with the biggest [email protected] of the world, and everything that you have gone through.

This all comes down to how much do you need this income and how quickly you think you can replace the income. 

I would try and do what ever for you to have a level head again (not to say you aren't, just this is so stressful), and don't do anything rash. Just use your lovely husband and son as your motivation to get over this. 

Feel free to vent here all you want.


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## Daniel A. (Mar 20, 2011)

Your a professional, law is not your profession.
First you need to hire a lawyer to protect yourself and at this stage a lawyer carries far more weight and can get things done.
Second the nut job needs to be gone you know the fasted way to make that happen.
You like what you do it may just take a bit of thought about listening to your instinct going forward.

Quitting won't solve your problem the lawyer will. 
Any negative interaction with police is bound to leave you feeling lousy and even worse if it appears the other party is still making gains at your expense.
Consider it a life lesson that your Charter Of Rights is not what you were raised to believe they are.

Fight for what you know is right.


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## Spidey (May 11, 2009)

It is a very frustrating story and I feel for what you are going through. You seem to have crossed paths with a sociopath. I think the advice to not make any decisions until you have a chance to calm down is a good one. A good start might be to book a further meeting with the owner or your bosses and revisit strategies to deal with this situation. I would also consider lodging a complaint with the police. A lawyer may be necessary, but the problem with that is that it is a further punishment to your pocketbook on top of everything else you've been through.


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## Four Pillars (Apr 5, 2009)

Sorry to hear about this Rachelle. Hopefully you get this resolved.

I would consider deleting your initial post.


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## LondonHomes (Dec 29, 2010)

Wow crazy story!

Stay strong and hire a lawyer (and maybe a camera crew to follow you around!)


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## Just a Guy (Mar 27, 2012)

I'm a little confused over things...you were authorized to terminate her, then she quit. You knew she was a pathological liar, yet you continued to have her work for you....

Why didn't you just pay out the remainder of her period and replace her like in most businesses? You take a small hit financially, but you get the person away from the company where they can inflict damage.

You didn't know about the dummy cameras in a building you managed for years and represents 50% of your income? They are a potential lawsuit in waiting for the owners and you...http://nickcardenas.blogspot.ca/2010/07/dummy-camera-lawsuit.html yes, it's mainly in the litigious US, but it's coming to Canada some day...

Now, I'm not trying to blame the victim here...It probably is some missing details as you are upset.

I agree you need a lawyer, and should probably consider a counter suit if things are as you say. Start, if you haven't already, documenting everything. 

If you've been doing a good job, your bosses should back you after all these years, and it shouldn't be hard to prove your case. It will be a long battle if she knows the system, but my bet is she'll back off and collapse if you counter sue.

I've had nutty tenants and employees in the past, best bet is to placate them, pay them out, and get rid of them ASAP.

Don't back down from this though, your reputation is worth defending. Take it all the way, the gloves are off...you need to fight until your name is cleared completely. It may be a long fight, but you need to do it.


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## OhGreatGuru (May 24, 2009)

From the Criminal Code of Canada:

_140. (1) Every one commits public mischief who, with intent to mislead, causes a peace officer to enter on or continue an investigation by
(a) making a false statement that accuses some other person of having committed an offence;
(b) doing anything intended to cause some other person to be suspected of having committed an offence that the other person hasnot committed, or to divert suspicion from himself;
(c) reporting that an offence has been committed when it has not been committed; or ...

(2) Every one who commits public mischief
(a) is guilty of an indictable offence and liable to imprisonment for a term not exceeding five years; or
(b) is guilty of an offence punishable on summary conviction.
_

It's time you went on the offensive and demanded that police lay charges against this criminal.

PS. You may have a case for false arrest and coercion ( to sign the release) against the police. You won't get any money for your legal costs and troubles from this employee, but the city has deep pockets. Maybe a letter from your lawyer to the Chief of Police and the City's legal Dept. will smarten them up.

PPS. Where are "the bosses" in all this? You were working on their behalf. Shouldn't they be defending you?

PPPS: Whose "employee" is this person anyway? Yours? "The Bosses'?" The owner's? Better get that sorted out, because her next step is probably going to be a wrongful dismissal charge with the Dept. of Labour.


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## ddkay (Nov 20, 2010)

Second the opinion you should hire a lawyer.


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## kcowan (Jul 1, 2010)

Rachelle
You have my sympathy. This is an unbearable situation and grossly unfair. The advice already rendered here is good.

Get a criminal defence lawyer. Not a civil lawyer. You can get a 30 minute interview with one before fees kick in.

This is a dark period but you will rise above it. We have confidence in your tolerance for BS because you are a property manager.

Go on the offensive.


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## Beaver101 (Nov 14, 2011)

kcowan said:


> Rachelle
> *You have my sympathy. *This is an unbearable situation and grossly unfair. The advice already rendered here is good.
> 
> *Get a criminal defence lawyer. Not a civil lawyer*. You can get a 30 minute interview with one before fees kick in.
> ...


 ... +1


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## dogcom (May 23, 2009)

Calm down for a bit and lawyer is good advice.


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## Mall Guy (Sep 14, 2011)

Are you a member of CREW ? Might be an area for support and advise, and recommendations on a lawyer. I think Four Pillars makes a good point about deleting the original post, as you don't really know where this is going, and don't want your words twisted yet again (and you have received some very strong support). Also agree you need to document everything while it is still fresh, as unfortunately, the final outcome maybe sometime in the future.


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## Cal (Jun 17, 2009)

Wow... What a frustrating situation.

Hopefully they will be out in a few days and with the help of a lawyer all of this will be behind you. 

From a financial perspective, I assume you would be able to claim the legal fees associated with your contract work.

Good Luck.


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## MrMatt (Dec 21, 2011)

Get a lawyer, if she's at the point you're being arrested and being detained in jail you need to be advised of your rights and protected, it can get a lot worse for you and you don't want that to happen.

And unless you talk to your lawyer, I wouldn't say anything to anyone, not here, not to the police, etc.


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## heyjude (May 16, 2009)

You have my sympathies. Don't be intimidated by this nutcase, and don't quit. Get a good lawyer immediately. Don't write anything in a public forum like this one, because it could end up in court and might not serve you well.


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## donald (Apr 18, 2011)

Get a lawyer,also(court evidence aside/situation aside)id be careful posting work/business problems over forums/blogs(your pretty transparent/your own blog/picture ect)the owner of the building and or future employer's in your line of work could access this info very easily.(your part of there investment/research,he could be reading this now)and it could hinder you going foward.I'm not trying to add another layer to this bad situation.I'm just a believer of keeping work specific problems off facebook/twitter/blogs/forums.(ie do private msgs,with close friends)(think through the eyes of a owner)Stay strong and you will get through this(seems like a very isolated event)Good luck,hope everything works out.


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## dogcom (May 23, 2009)

It is horrible how cheating and lying is rewarded in all of North America and telling the truth or being open and transparent is a no no. I often wonder how one can be successful in business, politics or investing in companies with so much cheating and lying going on. I guess in politics it would be impossible.


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## donald (Apr 18, 2011)

^ask the ex cfo of francesca corp.(his ex company burried him for a simply tweet)all he put was something like--good quater=happy board members--he was gone.Business is sport(they picked up a all star from mens warehouse(all legal)- cfo)You think it was really about the tweet.That's the coroprate world.How's that for transparent(im speculating but c'mon--it's obvoious)Look at how cp rail is going/went down with bill A.There killers.There is no room for a liberal mind.Its a game.No different than the romans.Truth does'nt win.M.o.That's fantasy!?


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## Berubeland (Sep 6, 2009)

Hi All,

I just want to thank you all for your kind words. The lady in question left the day before I wrote the original post. I've been dealing with her for about a month and half I guess. I'm guessing you all know by now I was totally freaking out :rolleyes2: 

I have to say the entire situation was very traumatic. The day after this post I could not deal with one more thing, not a tenant, not an owner, nothing. 

The advice to wait was very good, because although I was freaking out and mad at the owner of the building, his comment was just the straw that broke the camels back. Yes his comment was not nice but lets face it we were all under a tremendous amount of stress.

I knew she was some kind of crazy (in absence of a formal diagnosis) but I had no idea how crazy. I'm sure with the fantastic clarity of 20/20 hindsight I could have done things differently in the hopes of ending up with a better outcome for myself but for some reason she had focused most of her hostility towards me. (Maybe because I'm so charming) 

Actually now that I look back from the day I had the meeting with the owners I was actually terrified, because all the information and pieces of the puzzle came together that she was really deranged. From that point onwards I was completely shut down emotionally and dealing with what I considered a serious crisis. Kind of like waking up to find a rattlesnake in the middle of your business meeting. You don't really know what is going to happen. 

All things considered we got off really lightly. I have a lawyer to deal with my legal troubles but I'm fairly certain that nothing will come of it. I do have a clause in my contract and all property managers do that the owner is responsible for my legal bills in regards to situations like this. I have been sued by tenants before. 

I have to confess that since I have been managing properties, I had this idea that a building would be the perfect setting for an insane sitcom. Most of the people who work in buildings develop this bizarre gallows humour because we are constantly dealing with strange people. Like we have one lady in this building who goes on the second floor and unscrews all the lightbulbs. Every day we have to go back and screw them back in. 

This would make a hell of an episode. 

So after she left (taking the new super's air conditioner) with her, I was able to finally feel everything, like how fundamentally horrible it was. From the beginning I was doing damage control, making sure the building was locked down, then getting staff members in, then making sure they were ok, making sure they were always in pairs as much as possible, then taking care of my husband and son. They were both there and had to wait for 2 hours at the station. My son was completely messed up for about a week.

I was not really taking good care of myself. If you had asked me before I got all mad how I was coping, I would have said just fine. Unfortunately that just wasn't true, I wasn't sleeping properly for almost a month. 

I'm not really sure what kind of advice I would give someone in a similar situation, except plan that after all the crap is over you're going to need a few days to be completely out of your tree, without any demands on you to kind of decipher it all, let the stress off and then kind of put yourself back together again. It was particularly hard for me because I was the locus of her anger. I kept hearing all these stories come back to me about how I'd done this or that horrible thing. I can kind of imagine how a celebrity feels after reading the National Enquirer.

As for dealing with this kind of crazy, the advice I would give is just stay as far away as possible, and if you can't stay away, then really protect yourself better than I did. It's kind of hard to do because these people are so unpredictable. I would not have guessed what happened to me as an outcome of any dealings I had with her. I can't even blame anyone for believing her, she's really great at deception. She got past all my defenses and it took me quite a long time with daily contact to figure it out. I'd say my biggest mistake was underestimating her. I kept saying to people, you don't know how dangerous this type of person can be. In real life, she's grandmotherly. Nothing at all scary. I'm not really sure there is an effective way to deal with people like this. 

Anyways thank you all so much, I know the entire story sounds unbelievable. I'm just grateful that everyone involved is ok and I'm relatively unscathed.


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## kcowan (Jul 1, 2010)

Congratulations Rachelle. We were all in your corner cheering! Thanks for the update.

Now make sure you take some quality time with your family and share the lesson with your son...


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## dogcom (May 23, 2009)

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger comes to mind here.

You have learned a lesson that of course you shouldn't have to learn, but you did and now you have even more experience which is a good thing. Just think about this as well that when you retire you can help people you know through all that you experienced making you an always important person which is rare for older people.


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## mind_business (Sep 24, 2011)

Glad everything is working out now for you. I'm curious though, what is the outcome of your dealings with the Police. Do you now have a record? Do they understand the other lady involved was lying?


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## Berubeland (Sep 6, 2009)

The outcome of the police issue still has to be dealt with. Yesterday I got my promise to appear varied so I could attend the premises to go back to work. To do this you have to deal with the crown attorney. So that got done. From now on though I am in the "process" I don't even have a copy of disclosure so I have no idea what I supposedly had done. I can't even say what time "it" happened. 

I was in the building and I was doing some things that were timestamped such as interac payments. We have cameras in our lobby so you can see me come in and go to the office. I had several long appointments. It's still incredibly difficult to prove you did not do something especially when you were in the same location where the supposed incident occurred and the place is not videotaped. After all how long does it take to push someone? 30 seconds or so. 

One thing really in my favour is that on that particular day I was handing out Notices of Hearing for the Application to Vary a Rent Reduction. I was handing these out to all the residents in the building so I know who was home on that day. Even people who had moved in after and did not need a copy got one. That's because someone who shall remain nameless told everyone that they were getting a rent increase above the guideline. So I was doing damage control. 

Upon reflection though we got off relatively unscathed. Had she had longer access to the keys of all the apartments and office and key room it might not have went so well.


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## Cal (Jun 17, 2009)

Rachelle I am sure that sometimes you feel like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Xu_6VIZd08&feature=related

Things will work out.


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