# Do others experience this while working?



## james4beach (Nov 15, 2012)

I was out on vacation for over a week and just got back to my office job. I work regular hours Monday to Friday in an office, with a mix of computer work and meetings.

At the end of today, I feel like I had the stuffing kicked out of me. I'm just _exhausted_. The contrast between vacation and office work reminds me that, generally speaking, I'm usually exhausted and worn out after a day of work. I'm a bit like a zombie when I get back home and useless for anything else. Even the simplest tasks take forever. I'll try to cook some food for myself but that's generally all I can accomplish after work.

My question is: do the rest of you experience this too? And if you used to, but found a better way, please share.

I get plenty of exercise. In the last few days I biked and swam for hours. I swam at lunch today and ate a healthy lunch (salad, chicken). And I normally have very good energy. For example I can spend the whole day driving around, flying, etc and still have energy at the end of the day. I can spend the whole day hiking and doing physical things, and still have energy.

In other words I'm basically near my peak physical condition, and yet any day I go into the office *and work* more than about 7 hours, I'm pretty much wiped out.

So is this normal? Is there a better way? And if this is just how it is, how the heck am I supposed to do this for another 30 years?


----------



## james4beach (Nov 15, 2012)

Here's my broader concern. I have many interests outside of work -- including entrepreneurial activities -- and with this level of constant exhaustion, I find I just can't pursue them. I'm single, and even setting aside time for dating (finding the women and then wooing them) is difficult.

I'm in my 30s now and I don't want to see these good years of my life slip away while I slave away in an office. And to be honest, I refuse to do this for another 30 years. I'm looking for other options, or ways to change my life style.


----------



## new dog (Jun 21, 2016)

I just back from vacation a few weeks ago and coming back to work I have found getting up early is much harder then before my vacation. I always get up early anyway but not as early as when I go to work. After work is also more tiring but I have a feeling as the weeks go on I will just get back into the groove again. 

Lastly it has been hot lately and I have a very hard time getting used to the heat.


----------



## nortel'd (Mar 20, 2012)

james4beach said:


> I was out on vacation for over a week and just got back to my office job. I work regular hours Monday to Friday in an office, with a mix of computer work and meetings.
> 
> At the end of today, I feel like I had the stuffing kicked out of me. I'm just _exhausted_. The contrast between vacation and office work reminds me that, generally speaking, I'm usually exhausted and worn out after a day of work. I'm a bit like a zombie when I get back home and useless for anything else. Even the simplest tasks take forever. I'll try to cook some food for myself but that's generally all I can accomplish after work.
> 
> My question is: do the rest of you experience this too? And if you used to, but found a better way, please share.


Have you considered checking the air quality in your office and meeting rooms at your place of employment. 

The usual clue to poor indoor air quality is people feel ill while inside the building, and the symptoms go away shortly after leaving the building.


----------



## jargey3000 (Jan 25, 2011)

james ---would that I could go back 30+ years & feel the same way!
Get used to it . what you're feeling now is a bit of vacation jet-lag...quite common. - I remember the same thing... i used to have to fight the feeling of having a drink in the middle of the day, after returning from a well-oiled holiday..LOL
also, i think it might also vary from person to person , depending on just how much you honestly "love" or "hate" your job you're returning to.. for me, i was always in the latter category. I was always envious of anyone who said they truly "loved their job"!
However it is also an inevitable sign of another condition - it's called "aging" & it's not going to get any better.
when I was your age I could do anything, all day long, I just ran out of hours in the day!
then gradually...it doesn't happen over night... you find that you have to limit yourself a bit....prioritize work /tasks...wash one car, instead of two, cut the back OR the front lawn, not both...play softball once a week, not 3 times ...etc.
finally, as you past the 65 mark...you begin to admit to yourself that you're getting older - not younger, & you simply can't do all the things you once did. a melancholy feeling feeling takes over....
anyway...dont give in. One day you'll look back & wish you were still "having the stuffing kicked out of you & feeling exhausted" after working for 7-8 hours, and NOT feel like it as soon as you get up in the morning!! hahaha


----------



## STech (Jun 7, 2016)

james4beach said:


> Here's my broader concern. I have many interests outside of work -- including entrepreneurial activities -- and with this level of constant exhaustion, I find I just can't pursue them. I'm single, and even setting aside time for dating (finding the women and then wooing them) is difficult.
> 
> I'm in my 30s now and I don't want to see these good years of my life slip away while I slave away in an office. And to be honest, I refuse to do this for another 30 years. I'm looking for other options, or ways to change my life style.



Obviously I'm guessing here, but I have a feeling it's more emotional in your case than physical. Yes sitting in front of a computer and sitting through another meeting will take it's toll, but it's a whole lot worse when it's unfulfilling or emotionally draining work.

It's rather cliche to say go find what you love, and you'll never feel like you worked a day in your life. It's very hard to find that, and one that might pay well too. But if this is really the case for you, go out there and find that job/career that excites you, even if it pays a little less. I've been in your shoes. For many years I worked at a job only for the money. I kept telling myself, just another year to pay off the mortgage, or just another year to have another few bucks in the bank, but it was a very empty job, and I had a hard time dragging myself to work. Now, it's the opposite. I honestly get a little anxious to return to work after a week away, and the hours at work just fly by. Being happy at work, made me happier and more energetic at home. The drain and stress of constantly telling myself and my wife that I hated my work, and I could do better is finally gone.


Like you said, you're not gonna do it for another 30 years, so get going on it if you really mean that. It's only gonna harder and harder. Of course if you're making a very generous amount at the current job, and putting up with it for another 5 years, will mean early retirement, then you have to consider just grinding it out.

And lastly, don't take it too lightly that you're single. Humans are social creatures, and we need a partner in life. Even if you're surrounded by great family and friends, you still need that one close and intimate person, not to just roll around in bed, but someone that's there with you daily, and you can talk to about this kinda of stuff.

Don't sleep walk through your life, go out and change it for the better.


----------



## birdman (Feb 12, 2013)

Well, its all a blur now but I had a high pressure job, got home at 5:30, ate a quick meal and then we took our 3 boys to their baseball, soccer, skiing, or hockey- seven days a week. Often the boys were playing at different facilities and the wife and I each took one or two and went in different directions. Upon return was discussion of the day, homework, then getting them ready for bed. This continued as they got older but extra curricular activities were also there. Of course there was the usual house maintenance and repairs, the garden, and looking after the pool, fences, pruning, having a social life, and on and on it goes. Even with all this I managed to keep fit, play sports, and after retirement competed nationally and internationally. Looking back, it is all a blur but thankfully my wife did not work. I had no time to feel like the stuffing was kicked out of me.
After the children were pretty well on their own I did have some business pressures but these magically went away if I exercised vigorously AFTER work-just my experience. Also, one other thing is that in those days there were NO COMPUTERS, no checking the market and emails every couple of hours,and no texting. How much time does one spend on the latter these days?


----------



## Beaver101 (Nov 14, 2011)

^^^^^^ - we all average working stiffs (with the exception of those super-dads/moms) feel exhausted at the end of the day, primarily mentally. After 10 hours a day, day in and out, like 250+ days a year, years after years -it's called "burnt out" ... and 2/3/4 weeks vacation don't help either. By the time you wind down, you're ready to wind up again, especially you have to be constantly reminded about work with that laptop or iphone or whatever electronic gadget to be "connected" to the office. And after a decade or two - it becomes "flame-out".... and please for those "who loves their jobs so much (sans self-employment) and will never retire", it's propaganda.

J4B - maybe you have too many activities on your plate, eg. entrepreneurial, moderator task, etc. and staying up to the wee hours doesn't give the head a rest either.


----------



## Beaver101 (Nov 14, 2011)

nortel'd said:


> Have you considered checking the air quality in your office and meeting rooms at your place of employment.
> 
> The usual clue to poor indoor air quality is people feel ill while inside the building, and the symptoms go away shortly after leaving the building.


 ... yes, I noticed that - nothing more stifling and stinking like 'clean carpets' smell that gets recycled and ventilated all over.

PS: There's only so much plants can do to take in that glorious office-air.


----------



## Joebaba (Jan 31, 2017)

Hey James,

Your issue may be related to not getting enough sleep.

Take a look back at your own posts on here. Do you regularly see posts from yourself at 11 PM, 1 AM, 4AM, 8 AM, 11 AM, 2 PM and 6PM?

If you do, perhaps you’re spending too much time on your computer, posting and trying to help everyone else.

If you’re seeing that pattern, I’d suggest you pick a specific, limited, time of the day to allot to the CMF and other forums.
Maybe limit yourself to one hour a day. Make a commitment to only read/post on CMF and other forums from 7 PM to 8 PM each day (you can pick the time)
That way you can focus on only the important posts, leave yourself more hours to enjoy your other activities, get more exercise, and perhaps most importantly to get some sleep.

Wishing you well,

Joe


----------



## gibor365 (Apr 1, 2011)

James, start thinking about your next vacation , I was helping me when I was working , esp when I have vacation already booked . And I have very similar working routine that you are describing. 
Also , check your blood pressure....


----------



## nobleea (Oct 11, 2013)

Ha! I wish I was still at that phase of life. Yes, I remember that.

But wait until you are vacationing with babies/toddlers and young kids. Going back to work will feel relaxing.
The situation doesn't reverse itself again until the kids are older and fairly self sufficient, maybe 11-13ish.


----------



## gibor365 (Apr 1, 2011)

nobleea said:


> Ha! I wish I was still at that phase of life. Yes, I remember that.
> 
> But wait until you are vacationing with babies/toddlers and young kids. Going back to work will feel relaxing.
> The situation doesn't reverse itself again until the kids are older and fairly self sufficient, maybe 11-13ish.


Depends on how you educate your kids , We've been travelling in Austria/Germany when my kid was 3.5 y.o. and everything went fine....You just take them less to museums (except something like Madam Tussaud), cathedrals etc... but nature, castles was fine with him. In the worst case, you buy kid ice cream .
AI vacations are not a problem at all


----------



## bds (Aug 13, 2013)

James, I get the same thing from work, but not always. I believe it's a psychological reaction to doing work I don't think is valuable. I never get it from something I have decided is a priority for me to do, no matter how physically or mentally exhausting it really is. It only comes from my day job, after a day or pushing meaningless administrative paper or working on something I don't believe in... even if I don't actually work that hard on it - which I suspect is also because I don't consider it valuable.

I had the same thing at my old job, after the move to the current job a couple years ago the feeling was gone again until recently.

Sounds like you need a career change, or at least a change to a company that is doing something worth while. I know I'm looking at doing the same.

Vacations work well to help this, and I take them as often as I can, however it only lasts as long as the vacation. After the first day being back to work the feeling returns, no matter how long the vacation.


----------



## Plugging Along (Jan 3, 2011)

james4beach said:


> I was out on vacation for over a week and just got back to my office job. I work regular hours Monday to Friday in an office, with a mix of computer work and meetings.
> 
> At the end of today, I feel like I had the stuffing kicked out of me. I'm just _exhausted_. The contrast between vacation and office work reminds me that, generally speaking, I'm usually exhausted and worn out after a day of work. I'm a bit like a zombie when I get back home and useless for anything else. Even the simplest tasks take forever. I'll try to cook some food for myself but that's generally all I can accomplish after work.
> 
> ...


The way to solve this is to have young kids. Then you don't have time to be tired, I am actually being serious. 

Surprisely, I find I am like this after I take a vacation or if I have been doing less than normal. I find I am more tired if I have been less busy at work, sick, or at home 'relaxing' vs being on a go go schedule. It could be personality too, as I am very extravertred, and being along drains me. 

For me, it's a really delicate balance between being overwhelming busy, and not busy enough. I think it's more mental than not for me. I think once you get used to being busy and finding something to do every night you get used to it. That includes dating or going out. I sometimes think I am too tired to go out, but once I am out, I feel great. The alternative would have been me at home sitting surfing or doing nothing.


----------



## new dog (Jun 21, 2016)

nortel'd said:


> Have you considered checking the air quality in your office and meeting rooms at your place of employment.
> 
> The usual clue to poor indoor air quality is people feel ill while inside the building, and the symptoms go away shortly after leaving the building.


Air quality has been poor in the pacific northwest this summer because of all the forest fires in BC, Washington State and Oregon. This could also be bothering James.


----------



## paigej (Aug 21, 2017)

*travel & work balance*

I felt a lot of the same feelings you do right now. The feeling that I'm wasting my life away in an office for nine hours a day and the urge to travel the world with only a limited amount of days to do it in. I decided enough was enough and quit my traditional office job, for a job working remote from home. Maybe this is something that you should take into consideration as well. Many new age companies and tech startups allow workers to put in their time without leaving their home. This also allows me to travel a lot more because I'm able to work from anywhere. Although, those feelings of exhaustion after a full work day are still there because to be honest, it is very draining sitting a computer for eight hours a day and putting your mind to work constantly in that way. Something else that has helped me, if you do not have access to work from home, is meditation before bed and once you wake up. It refreshes your mind and helps you feel more alert with constant practice. You may also want to take a deeper look into your diet. Maybe there is something missing that is making you feel extra groggy. Lack of iron or dehydration can lead to exhaustion


----------



## sags (May 15, 2010)

It is called the "middle aged blues".................


----------



## james4beach (Nov 15, 2012)

Thanks everyone for the excellent responses. I am going to wait until after work to read them and think about them, but I think many of you have hit on things that are relevant to my situation.


----------



## james4beach (Nov 15, 2012)

Leaving work now at 7:20 pm. I came in at 9:30 so I've spent nearly 10 hours in the office with just a little break to step outside to grab lunch.

What fun!! Please, may I have 30 more years of this?


----------



## pwm (Jan 19, 2012)

J4B, I feel for you. I felt the same way you do so many times through my career. One thing I found is that one or even two weeks vacation is not enough. You need at least three weeks. You're still thinking about work for the first week away and you start thinking about it on the last week, so only three weeks gives you a true week without any thoughts of work. Otherwise you will eventually suffer burnout.


----------



## Eclectic12 (Oct 20, 2010)

J4B ... have felt similar on a regular basis. What I have learned is that the fix depends on the cause. At times, all that was needed was to do something physical to reinforce that I am not at work anymore and should focus on other things. Other times, a bit of food does the trick. At other times, getting more sleep does the trick. The extreme was to change companies/jobs.

Sticking to one approach hasn't worked for me.




pwm said:


> ... One thing I found is that one or even two weeks vacation is not enough. You need at least three weeks. You're still thinking about work for the first week away and you start thinking about it on the last week, so only three weeks gives you a true week without any thoughts of work. Otherwise you will eventually suffer burnout.


One has to know oneself ... lots of people tell me this but so far, one day or less has been enough to stop thinking about work and other than preparation such as "what to make for lunch tomorrow", I start thinking about work at work, on the first work day back.

Doesn't make it any less true for those who need a week to stop thinking about work but AFAICT, nothing writes this in stone.


Cheers


----------



## new dog (Jun 21, 2016)

You may also need to add things to your work day that makes it better for you. In the morning I will go to McDonalds and buy a large coffee with 2 cream and a muffin for $2.60 and read the news papers they have available. 

Then I will listen to sports talk in the car or whatever and then start work. If I went to work right away and started right away I would find it a bit depressing. 

Also I would not think of work during this time.


----------



## james4beach (Nov 15, 2012)

I think the low-hanging fruit for me is to get more sleep. You guys are right, I'm often up late at night at posting at CMF. I will start with the obvious (sleep).


----------



## off.by.10 (Mar 16, 2014)

james4beach said:


> I think the low-hanging fruit for me is to get more sleep. You guys are right, I'm often up late at night at posting at CMF. I will start with the obvious (sleep).


Not just sleep but uninterrupted sleep. I have found while having young children that a few (or even just one) interruption in the wrong part of the night, each night, could leave me physically rested but mentally exhausted after several days, much like what you describe. It's a weird state to be in as just going to bed earlier did not help much. I often ended up waking earlier, with my body "rested" but my brain still tired. It takes several days to recover from that.


----------

